“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” —Proverbs 4:23
Most CEO’s don’t realize this, but true leadership is a matter of the heart. You want the quick hack to motivate your people, but those tips and tricks won’t work unless your heart is oriented correctly. In the information age, we put knowledge, problem-solving, and other intellect-oriented activities at the top of the leadership list. But the truth is, the heart is central. The fact that we even need to be reminded of this only shows how far we have fallen from the life we were meant to live, and how we must lead.
The subject of the heart is addressed in the Bible more often than any other topic—more than works or service, more than belief or obedience, more than money, and even more than worship.
For example, here are some Bible passages that deal with the heart:
- Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. (Deut. 6:5) [Jesus called this the greatest of all the commandments—and notice that the heart comes first.]
- Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart. (1 Sam. 16:7)
- Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Luke 12:34)
- Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. (Prov. 3:5)
- Your word I have treasured in my heart, That I may not sin against You. (Ps. 119:11 NASB)
- These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. (Matt. 15:8)
- For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chron. 16:9)
- All a man’s ways seem right to him, but the LORD weighs the heart. (Prov. 21:2)
This prominence, that continues throughout the Bible, shows us that our heart is one of the most important things to work on, to consistently care for and nurture.
What is the “Heart” and Why Does it Matter?
So with this said, what actually is the heart? And why does it matter? Put simply, the heart is the deepest and most central aspect of our life. According to James Houston, it is “the innermost part of the human personality,” and “the center of those qualities that make us human.”
In short, the heart is who we are. The real self. My heart is the real me, and your heart is the deepest, truest you. That is why the heart is central. It is your most precious possession.
The heart can be troubled, wounded, cheerful, or glad. It can be whole or divided, wise or foolish. It can be steadfast, true, upright, stout, and valiant. It can also be frightened and faint. The heart can be wandering, forgetful, dull, stubborn, proud, and hardened. The heart represents the full range of being human, so being wholehearted is to be fully human.
The impact of being wholehearted in leadership is massive, and because of that, the flip side is also true. The impact on NOT being wholehearted in your leadership is also massive:
- Your identity and worth is wrapped up in outcomes and external things, and thereby you’re unable to attend to the humanity of your team.
- You are unable to bring strength, love, and dignity on behalf of your team; when you do bring those things, it’s to be acknowledged by your team for those blessings.
- Your response to unforeseen uncertainty and change damages relationships
- All your attention is put on “resume virtues”, such as accomplishments, awards, air miles traveled, or dollars earned, and very little attention is placed on “eulogy” virtues like impact, legacy, and character.
Leadership Takes Courage
The heart is also the source of our courage. In fact, the word “courage” itself comes down to us from the Old French word, cuer, which came from the Latin cor, meaning “heart.”
It takes courage to trust someone enough such that you drop the pretense of being perfect, and instead say things like, “I’m sorry,” “I messed this up,” or “I don’t know.”
It takes courage to believe someone on your team will follow through on something they haven’t done before.
It takes courage to prioritize people when you’re thrown a major curve ball (i.e. a global pandemic) and your sales have fallen off a cliff.
It takes courage to innovate when the tried-and-true methods have worked for decades.
It also takes courage to create intimacy and connection with others in your leadership.
The kind of leadership that transforms a culture and achieves exponential results is all about connections. The heart is the connecting point; it is the meeting place between any two persons. In fact, the kind of connection we crave with others in the workplace can be experienced only from the heart. Your people don’t want to be someone’s project or resource; they want to connect with you. They want to feel seen, as though they belong and they matter.
Leading and connecting in this way leads to real engagement between people, which directly affects productivity.
The Battle
Because your heart is central to everything, you have to guard it above all else. Think of it like this: you live in a war zone, and the battle is for your heart. The Bible tells us this, in these passages:
- “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” 1 Peter 5:8
- “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy…” John 10:10
The reality of your life is that there will be a lifelong, orchestrated assault on your heart by those around you who want to see you fail. The enemy knows that if you lose heart, everything collapses. This enemy fears who you can be, and the impact you can have if you’re wholehearted.
What is this impact? A wholehearted leader can:
- Create a culture where people feel cared for, respected, and able to use their gifts to their full potential
- Deliver a life-saving or live-improving product or service to the market
- Inspire others to be wholehearted through their own example
The problem is, most people – most leaders – aren’t living like they have an enemy. Leaders tend to look for psychological, physical, or even socio-political explanations for every trouble they face.
This is a cunning move by our enemy to divert attention elsewhere, so he can continue his assault. He can and does use outside forces to take us out, but his weapon is far more sneaky: he uses debilitating lies. I’ve experienced these attacks first hand:
- When a plan goes sideways, there’s the lie: “Jeff, you’re a loser.”
- When sales dip: “Jeff, it’s all up to you” which then morphs into, “you’re not enough.”
- When I lose my cool at my kids: “you’re a terrible father.”
- When things aren’t happening as quickly as I’d like: “you’re a knucklehead. You’ve missed what God is doing. You better hope he comes back around.”
I’ve learned over the years to recognize these lies, to avoid being completely taken out, but my heart takes a hit in the moment and I retreat inward at the expense of my wife, kids, team, and colleagues.
Try taking a moment to think to yourself, what are the lies the enemy slings at me? Do any of these sound familiar?
- “I’m on my own”
- “Don’t trust anyone”
- “I’ll prove them wrong”
- “I can’t be trusted”
Do you see what’s happening when you are told these lies? They build and build until they collapse a leader in on themselves, putting the focus completely on them.
As a leader, the steps that lead to this collapse may look like this:
- Staying in control of important tasks and projects, feeling unable to either delegate or empower others to act
- Refusing to be vulnerable to protect themselves from mistakes or from looking inferior. This includes not seeking feedback or putting themselves in situations where they might be wrong.
- Withdrawing from moments where leadership needs to be asserted.
- Feeling hurried to find the right answers or solution to problems
- Working themselves to exhaustion
- Make personal sacrifices of family and other relationships in pursuit of professional achievements
Leading your organization is a big task, and it’s going to take a wholehearted warrior to succeed in this job. Guarding your heart requires a coordinated battle plan, which starts with grounding yourself in the truth. Here are three truths to start with and remind yourself of:
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. Psalm 23:1
Everything comes from him; Everything happens through him; Everything ends up in him. You shouldn’t and can’t do this alone. Romans 11:36 (MSG)
I’m convinced: You can do anything and everything. Nothing and no one can upset your plans. Job 42:2 (MSG)
The next step is to realize and internalize what Paul said in Romans 11. You shouldn’t, and can’t, do this alone. Leadership unto itself is hard enough, and adding the battle for your heart makes it overwhelming. Don’t do it alone. Whether it’s with fellow leaders who are also walking this road and fighting this fight, or with a coach, create allies for the battle.
If you would like me to be a part of your battle plan, please connect with me and DM me on Linkedin (https://www.linkedin.com/in/brilliantcoach/) or drop me an email to schedule a time together (jeff@brilliancewithincoaching.com).